Truths

The truth is.....

I haven't wondered at all what you look like 

What you sound like in person 

How you smile 

How'd you look at me 

Or have I?

The truth is.....

 I felt something that very first phonecall 

It was almost like an electrical charge 

I felt the need to be connected to you 

But couldn't understand why

I just knew I wanted to talk to you again 

The truth is....

I've imagined far too many things 

Scenarios, conversations and even touch 

You keep me awake at night 

And alert all day 

I do nothing but smile 

Even through Covid! 

The truth is.....

I hope in person I feel everything I do now and more 

I hope this feeling is tangible and not imaginary or fleeting 

Can two people know each other so well and as yet, not met each other?

Sally x 

"Just Coffee?"

 I've been twisting inside myself 

Keeping this secret 

Well not really a secret, more of a confession

A revelation if you will 

Another side of myself I have not yet exposed 

As many of us do, I have this innate fear of being judged 

Of being looked at a certain way 

And that eats away at my confidence 

And my self worth 

But above all things honesty is the one trait I value above all else 

Which is why I need to be honest with you 

There are two things I have not shown about myself 

Neither one of these changes who I am 

But could possibly affect how you see me 

And ultimately saying Hello over coffee! 

I don't know where this is going 

Or even what this is? 

I mean, it's intense and has happened so quickly 

My head is still spinning 

I don't know what you see, 

Or how come random texts have turned into full blown opening our souls up 

I should've stopped it before it snowballed 

Should've stepped back and just kept quiet 

Even now I'm thinking "Why are saying anything, it's just coffee!"

But what if it isn't 'just coffee' ?

I feel so very comfortable in your presence and yet we've not even been in the same room 

Have to admit, it's fucking with my head big time

But I'm trying not to analyse the shit out of it

If it's 'just coffee' then all of this is irrelevant

And my confession or my truths can be put to bed 

If it's just mates, with dinner and movie nights it's all good 

If it's a night out dancing, setting the world to rights as good friends 

That sounds perfect. 

Anything more, and I will bare my soul 

And let you decide then, if coffee and an axe are still on the table !!!

Is it just coffee?

Sally x

 

It's Okay

 Those walls around you 

So carefully constructed

Each brick, logically  placed 

Each memory carefully boxed 

And filed 

And I've taken a hammer to them! 

It's okay 

To feel exposed

Vunerable 

Naked even 

You're on this rollercoaster right now 

Without a safety bar or seatbelt in sight 

I see you 

Those memories, although tangible 

No longer have the power they used to 

Those thoughts so considerately put to bed 

Can no longer claw at your conscience 

It's all part of the make up of you 

We all have ugly parts 

Darkness like treacle, seeping into all our goodness

Doubts and insecurities clawing their way to the surface 

Step back and breathe 

Revel in all that you have conquered 

And bloody smile 

A great big, Cheshire cat smile 

And say "Fuck you World!'

Cos you are way stronger than you feel 

Just have a little faith in yourself 🙂

Sally x

The Psychopath Joker

 Hey you 

I see you, 

Hiding 

Masking your unrest with humour 

Chasing with devilment and a teasing wink.

Hey you 

I see you 

That soft spoken 

Once broken,  charmer of a man 

Shamelessly open and honest 

Hey you 

I hear you 

Have felt that pain

Touched that darkness 

And embraced the unknown

Hey you 

I hear you 

Those silent screams 

Filtering  unanswered questions 

Sifting through life's dilemmas 

Hey you 

I see you 

I see the light in you 

Through you 

Around you. 

And 

I 

Smile 😊

Sally x